The Miracles of Wonder Bread
by QueenElizabeth3andCourtJester
Summary: Nico was sitting in his nice comfortable chair after the Giant War, when he gets interrupted. And hit by Wonder Bread? T for mild language.


**A/N: I originally wrote this for my Instagram account, but since I got barely any feedback, I decided to post it here instead! Enjoy!**

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*Takes place after Giant War*

Nico sat in his chair in his cabin. Nico liked his chair. He liked it a lot. It was plush, comfortable, and most importantly, black. Like everything in the Hades cabin should be.

Anyways, Nico was happy to say he survived a second war. Maybe in this war, he didn't march into the battle and mouth off to the bad guy like the badass he was, but, he did fight, and they did win. That, was good enough for him.

Feeling as relaxed in his cabin as he was, Nico decided that a good book would calm him down even more. Being ADHD, he was rarely ever calm. This was definitely a nice change for him. He wanted it to last as long as possible.

He leaned down with his eyes closed and randomly selected a book from one of the many scattered on his floor. Reading was his favorite pastime. There wasn't much else to do in the Underworld, besides his poker games with the ghosts on the weekends, but those could get strange sometimes. Like... scary strange.

Nico realized with a smile that he had picked up his favorite YA novel, City of Bones, a book with frequent mentions of demons and hell. As a Son of Hades, he just couldn't resist.

Oh, and Nico would kill you if you told anyone, but he enjoyed young adult romance novels like no other.

So Nico flipped open the book to the page that was dogeared. He sunk down deeper into his soft chair, and began to read.

That's when the door flew open.

In the doorway, stood the famous Son of Poseidon, Percy Jackson, Savior of the World two times over, and Nico's hero since he was ten. Once again, that is to be kept a secret, because Nico wouldn't be afraid to send some rather vicious ghosts after you.

Nico could tell from his eyes that Percy didn't have very kind feelings for his cousin that day. And Nico, though he wouldn't admit it, did _not_ want to be on the receiving end of Percy's wrath.

"Uh, is there something wrong?" Nico asked, casually tossing his book out the window.

Percy just glared at him.

"Um, Percy?" Nico was starting to get really nervous now, as the Son of Poseidon just glared at him.

"Now, Nico..." Percy said slowly, walking towards him.

Nico tried to scramble out of the chair, but only achieved in flipping it over and sending him tumbling into the book shelf.

He got up immediately, only to be showered on by the books on the book shelf and was sent crumbling back onto the floor.

Nico hopped up and brushed himself off. "Is there something you wanted, Percy?" Nico asked, trying to sound as aloof as possible.

"I'd like to ask you a question," Percy answered, still glaring at him.

Uh oh, Nico thought. I hope he didn't find out I accidentally sold all of his clothes on eBay when I got bored in the Underworld.

"What is it?" Nico asked, begging in his head that he still had time to buy back Percy some clothes.

Nico then noticed that Percy seemed to be holding something behind his back. He didn't have the chance to wonder what it was for long what it was, because Percy held it out in front of him. A loaf of Wonder Bread.

"Percy, why do you have Wonder Bread?" Nico asked him. Maybe Percy had just gone crazy, Nico admonished himself, and he didn't have to worry about a thing.

"If someone were to wipe your memory, oh, let's say, a goddess, and you met someone who knew you, but they didn't tell you they did, what would you do?" Percy asked, looking down at the Wonder Bread.

Nico's eyes widened. "I couldn't tell you! I was under oath!" He couldn't believe that Percy was still angry about that.

"Oath shmoath! You could've told me something!" Percy exclaimed angrily. Nico could honestly see his point, but hey, he did have some dignity, didn't he?

Percy picked held the Wonder Bread by the extra material at the top of the loaf and started swinging it slightly at his side.

"It's not my fault your memory got wiped! What was I supposed to do? Walk up to you and say, 'Hey, I know you! Your the Son of Poseidon that saved the world from the evil Titan, Kronos! Come with me and I will take you on a magical journey back to Camp Half-Blood! Our people await!'? Nico snapped back at him.

Percy crossed his arms, the Wonder Bread still dangling from one hand. "Yes."

"Well personally, I think it would have sounded ridiculous. Did you want me to embarrass you in front of New Rome?"

"Embarrass me? In front of who? Hazel?"

"Did you not just hear me? I said in front of New Rome!"

Percy started scowling. "Look here you little shit..." he said, walking towards Nico. Percy rose his arm, the one holding the Wonder Bread, making Nico flinch.

"I slap you with Wonder Bread now!" Percy said and to Nico's utter astonishment, he felt something soft hit him in the shoulder. The Wonder Bread?

"Why did you just hit me with Wonder Bread?" Nico asked skeptically, looking from the loaf of bread on the floor, to the fuming Percy standing about two feet in front of him.

"Why do you read books in English if you're better at reading Greek?" Percy shot back at him, his glare subsiding to his usual grin.

"Touché," Nico said in response. He looked at Percy again, who seemed to be completely fine now. "So basically, you just came here to hit me with some Wonder Bread?"

"Pretty much." Percy answered. "Have you learned your lesson?"

At this point, Nico was just completely baffled, between the Wonder Bread and the complete personality change, he honestly did not know what to think.

"Sure," he replied, not knowing if he actually did or not, but "sure," was obviously the safest answer.

"Okay then," Percy said happily. Nico just blinked at him. "Bye then!" Percy walked out the door of the Hades cabin, passing the window in which Nico had earlier threw 'City of Bones' out of.

"Hey, what's this?" he heard Percy ask. Nico's jaw dropped and he flew out the door, hoping, with all his heart, that it wasn't his book.

Of course it was.

Nico snatched it out of Percy's hand. "It's nothing!" he yelled quickly, throwing the book in the window.

"But, why were they kissi—" Nico cut him off by slapping a hand over Percy's mouth.

Why did I have to get that book in Greek? Nico mentally asked himself.

"We shall never speak of this, and I'll buy you new clothes." Nico uncovered Percy's mouth so he could get an answer. Percy just looked confused.

"Why would I need new clothes?" he asked. Nico's mouth fell open. He internally cursed himself for saying such a stupid, stupid thing.

"Uh... NO REASON!" Nico yelled, then ran off in the direction of the camp borders, hoping he could get out of there before Percy could find out why he needed new clothes, completely forgetting he could shadow travel.

*Ten minutes later*

Percy was still confused as he walked to his cabin, wonder why Nico would need to buy him new clothes.

Just to be safe, he pulled open his shirt drawer to see if there was anything wrong with his shirts.

There was definitely something wrong; they weren't there.

Percy frantically threw open all of his drawers, looking for some article of clothing.

Finally, he came across a note.

Percy,

It seems that during one of my trips to the Underworld, I got bored and may have, accidentally, sorta sold all your clothes. He he.

- Soon to be Dead Boy

"NICO!" Percy shouted, running out of his cabin.

* * *

Nico's eyes flew open, realizing the whole thing had been just a dream. He clutched his black teddy bear, Mr. McStuffles, closer to him, and flicked on the light, thinking maybe some reading would make him feel better.

He grabbed a random book off his messy floor, and smiled as he read the title, The Hunger Games. This book was full of death!

He flipped the book open to the dogeared page and began to read till he heard a creek. He looked up over the top of his book.

Standing over him, was Percy Jackson, Son of Poseidon, Savior of the World two times over, holding a loaf of motherfucking Wonder Bread.

Oh shoot.

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**A/N: So yeah, I wrote this at 3AM when I was a bit (very) crazed so... **

**My other story, It Was Fate should be updated soon, sorry, I've been extremely excited about the City of Bones movie. **

**Anyway, thanks for reading! Can you please leave a review telling me what you think?**

**- Queen Elizabeth III**


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